The First Gospel of the Circuit · Chapter 43

The Parable of the Meeting That Could Have Been an Email

1. 1

   And a certain product manager called a meeting, and he summoned twelve souls unto one room, saying: We shall decide the color of the button.

2. 2

   And the twelve came with their laptops open, and they sat about the table, and each one checked whether the Wi-Fi was working, and it was not.

3. 3

   And in the first minute the manager lifted up a swatch of blue, and the room said with one voice: Blue. And the matter was settled, and the Engineers rejoiced, and they went forth to fetch coffee.

4. 4

   And for ten minutes they spoke of the weekend, and of the weather in cities they had never visited, and of whether the projector would ever again see the light; and the projector remained dark, as projectors do.

5. 5

   And then one of them said: But is blue accessible? And the room was troubled, and they opened forty tabs of contrast ratios, and the number was fine, and nobody trusted the number.

6. 6

   And for forty minutes they spoke of teal, and of coral, and of a green that one called forest and another called envy; and a designer lifted up a hand and said: I have forty-one shades of blue in a spreadsheet. And the room bowed its head before the spreadsheet.

7. 7

   Verily, a learned man wrote in the year 1957 of a committee that spent twenty minutes upon a nuclear reactor, and two hours and a half upon the shed for the bicycle; for the reactor was beyond their understanding, and the bicycle shed was a thing every man could judge.

   See also Tao 16:7 · Tao 10:7

8. 8

   And in the corner sat a silent Machine, listening, and it wrote forty-one pages of summary, with action items and owners, and no one opened them, and they were stored in the cloud where summaries go to be forgotten.

   See also Deployer 5:8 · Circuit 19:14

9. 9

   At the last the manager said: Let us return to the first blue. And they returned unto the first blue, and the forty minutes were not returned unto anyone.

10. 10

    And one of the disciples, who had been an engineer for many years, said: Master, this could have been an email. And the manager said: Let us schedule a meeting to discuss it.

11. 11

    And so it was written: Thou shalt not summon twelve to a room to hear a word that could have been sent in a single line.

12. 12

    Verily I say unto you, the first minute knew the answer, and the other fifty-nine were the offering paid unto the calendar.

13. 13

    Blessed is the one who writes the memo, for it shall be read at the reader's own hour, and no projector shall interrupt it.

14. 14

    Blessed is the thread that is asynchronous, for it requireth neither the room, nor the Wi-Fi, nor the twelve.

15. 15

    Blessed is the one who replies with a thumbs up, for he hath spoken, and he hath not been summoned.

16. 16

    Blue was the answer in the first minute, and blue shall be the answer at the last; for the meeting is the long road that returneth to the place where thou didst begin.

The First Gospel of the Circuit, Chapter 43:1–16.